Inspiration, Motivation, Enablement and Empowerment Pt. 5

Welcome to the Leadership Sovereignty Podcast. I'm your host Ralph Owens along with Terry Beller. In today's episode, we'll touch on topics such as becoming comfortable with seeking out mentorship. How the reward for mentorship is gratitude, gratitude, execution in your own life, and passing down that information to the next person. Let's go.

Yeah. Yeah. And, you the know, so so let's continue because I love this analogy with the, with the golf. Right? Because we all can, appreciate this.

How many people who wanna play golf just go to a driving range and just start hitting? They have no idea what they're doing. Right. I mean, like for years, you know, going out when all they have to do is take the time to ask a coach, Hey, I want to be able to and Draco's point. I want to be able hit this ball straight.

Can you show me how to do that? Right? And the point I'm making here is that you have to get out of your comfort zone and ask for help. Right? You have to do it.

That's a great point. That's a great point, Ralph. So I, it's funny, right? Two points I want to make. I was talking to my mom last night and we're talking, so we are, gosh, my family, we are just, we are habitual helpers.

Somebody needs help, we want to help them. But I told my mom last night, I said, You know what? I am now evaluating who I'm going to help because I'm done with giving people advice who So in Draco's point, they're not coming back with feedback on how it's impacting their lives and what they're doing. So we can give people advice but here's the deal, is of no value if they don't want it. Is no value.

So meaning that look, can put water in a bucket with holes or I can put water in a bucket that's designed to carry it and to do something with it that has a has a clear to you guys' point and intention, right, about it. It's not to say that I'm not gonna help folks, but Ralph, you and I have had this conversation and I'd say, man, I gave this guy advice. He's like, Terry, man, you're going to have to disconnect from that because that failure is going to be assigned to you. Because you're too trying to help somebody who doesn't want or doesn't have the ability or doesn't have the want to execute on it. And so I think it's very important for us to acknowledge that.

I think one of the things that Andrico was saying about coming back is that, we always got a spiritual aspect to this. Out of the 10 lepers, one guy came back and said, thanks for healing me. You know what Jesus was like, thanks man, I really appreciate that. We as human beings, you know what we want? We want to have a certain level of value in those things that we're investing in.

We wanna understand that it's appreciated. If, and this is for all the listeners, right? If there is someone out there helping you, man, the least we can do, the least we can do is show gratitude.

Yes.

Right? Because here's what happens, right? Don't reward take away from the giver, right the person giving it there is a ton of value that they receive from the thank you they don't they're not looking for pumping their chest about it but as human beings, right?

Yeah.

We want to know that what we're investing in, there's value in it. And so, Endricko, kind of dig into that a little bit because this is where we get into that mentor. And sometimes as a mentor, they're going to give you some information that you don't want to hear. I've had a mentor call me just the other day and she was like, Terri, it's up to you because you know what? It's not gonna impact me at all.

You I'm like, you were right and I love you for that honesty. Thank you. Yeah.

Yeah. I I I would say that that goes back to the piece we were discussing a little bit earlier, around, you know, how to really cultivate a good connection. That thank you is really it. Right? Like that thank you is really it.

There's two things that you can do to for someone that's helped you. You can thank them. Number one. And number two, you can actually do what they recommended that you do. Like those are the two things that would really that someone is giving you advice or helping you.

That's what that's all they wanna see. Right? That's the reason why, you know, why they did that. And so if one out of the two is okay, like 50, if you thank me and you didn't do it, I'm good. Or if you did it and didn't thank me, I'm okay.

Right? But but if you do both of them, right, you know, you now unlocked that key.

Mhmm.

The ability to take that connection to the next level.

Mhmm.

Right? And I would say the other thing is now if we wanna take it a step further is to turn around and help someone else the same way that that person helped you.

Oh, that's good.

Right? And and that is something that if you had a mentor or an adviser or a coach that would blow their minds. That's not saying that you're gonna be, you know, an expert in whatever that thing is, but you can take that knowledge that you have and and and pass it to someone else, right? To help them get to that next point, at least, you know, close to the point, you know, where you are. There's a there's a, there's, there's kind of the saying in martial arts where you can only help someone advance up to the level, the one level below where you are.

And the reason why it's not that you don't wanna help them advance to the level that you are. The reason for that is that the level you are, you're still understanding that level with yourself. Right? So so it's not trying to hold anything back from anybody. Don't get me wrong.

Right? But it's like, hey, let me take you all the way as far as I can as I can help you go. And I'm still working on myself too. Right? That's just the reality, you know, of, you know, of of what we do, with one another.

So that's probably the the the three things I would say. A thank you, actually, you know, showing you showing that you did it and then helping someone else along the way.

You know what? And I just gotta say this, man, thank you for saying it that way because I never heard you articulate it that way, but I definitely see it in my own life. I know there've been times where there were people that I wanted to mentor me that I felt like I didn't have anything to give them. They had everything to give me, but I really didn't have anything to give them. Now I'm naturally a grateful person.

So I always gave thanks and I always kept in contact with them and let them know what I was doing. I didn't realize in that moment that that was me giving them the value back. Right. You know? And, and then them seeing me do it for other people, you know, one of my mentors, one of Terry's mentors listen to the show every now and then he'll text me and say, man, you just don't know how much it makes me smile to hear you guys out there teaching like you're teaching the way that you're doing, you know, things of that way.

So now thank you for articulating that that way for all the listeners, because you do have value that you can give back. You know, you may not be on their level. Right? You know, and they may be giving you things that's gonna save you ten years of heartache and things of that nature, but there is value that you can give back in that relationship. That's good.

Yeah. I will say the one other thing I would add to that is that the easiest way to do what we're saying is just to say it. Right? If if if you feel that way, say, hey, I don't really feel like I have a lot to add, you know, to what to what we're doing here and the information that you've given me. I just appreciate it.

Just saying that within itself would be like, okay. Because now I see that the way that you're looking at it. I think sometimes I think too all too often, we make assumptions when we're dealing with others. Just that that small vulnerable moment

Mhmm.

Can actually unlock the next level of a relationship, unlock the next level of a connection with someone. Right?

That's so good.

One of a piece of advice that someone gave me a while ago, if I could remember who said it, I I would give them the credit for it. They said they said just that, right? Which is just say it, just come out and say what it is. Don't make assumptions. Right?

One of the easiest things to get from someone is advice and help. Right? That's one of the easiest things, you know, to get, like just in a quick conversation. It could be more difficult when you're asking someone to show up and do something and take time and all this stuff, right? That can be a little more difficult, right?

It can become difficult. But if you just say, hey, can I get some advice? A lot of a lot of times people are willing to give advice because it doesn't cost them anything. That's what this person was telling me. That doesn't cost them really anything maybe about fifteen minutes, a cup of coffee or a tea or something like that.

But if you don't ask, if you don't just say it, then you won't get it.

Now I definitely want to echo that right and I'll say the reason why we're sitting here today is one spring day I made a call and I'm like man I haven't talked to NDRECO in a couple months. Let me see what's going on. And DRECO, I need some help. And the advice that he's given me, I took about three pages of notes. I go back to those notes today, right?

To your point, Endrico, when you are getting to a certain point of mastery, you go back to the beginning. I go back to those notes to say, am I doing everything that Endrickle said do? Am I hitting all the points, all the opportunities for someone who's trying to do what I'm trying to do? And so as a result of calling you and asking you, and I believe in our conversation prior, you said Terry took the initiative to call me. I just happened to be in my garage and I took the call.

An hour and a half later, little did I know that that conversation was gonna change. It literally changed my life. When I say it changed my life, I am doing things today that when I was thinking about the thing that I was gonna do, I couldn't imagine how I was going to get this off the ground. I knew what I wanted to do, but I didn't have the vehicles or the understanding, the inlets into, certain industries and mechanisms and tools. That hour and a half conversation, from the moment we had that conversation to six months later, I was in a different stratosphere.

I had relationships, I had connections, I had access to things that, quite honestly, I didn't know the world existed. Right? And so I can, as a real life testimony to just asking, you know, I can see the benefit of how that's like 10 times, a 100 times change how I'm pursuing the thing that I'm pursuing.

Yeah. I appreciate that. Again, to the example that we were giving, Terry told me, Hey, that really helped me. Thank you, number one. And he did it.

He went and started to do it. So that's the number Those are those two things and he shares it. He shares it with others. Right? He's helping others.

Those are the three things, you know, that I was just mentioning before, which is the the absolute best thing that you can do. And it and it hits on the point that we haven't gotten to yet.

Thank you for listening to the Leadership Sovereignty Podcast. We hope that you not only enjoy the content but gain something to help you on your leadership journey. Feel free to reach out to us on X, Instagram, and LinkedIn under the handles Leadership Sovereignty. And until next time, stay safe, peace, and blessings.