Your perspective your choice. Pt.3

Welcome, and thank you for tuning in to the Leadership Sovereignty Podcast. I'm your host, Ralph Owens, along with Terry Bell. In today's episode, we'll cover topics such as getting stuck, maintaining your brand, understanding human behavior, navigating through pain, and finding a place of agreement. Enjoy the show. You are playing this game whether you think you are or not, And you can either be mad at the game and lose or you can learn how to win at the game and prosper.

Right? And I know for me that's the point that I got to because there was a time in my life where I was just mad because of I saw this injustice or I saw, you know, I didn't think this was right. I didn't think that was right. But then I started looking around me and those who were just upset at what they saw, they weren't prospering. They were stuck right there.

Twenty years later, guess what? They're still talking about what they mad about twenty years ago. I'm gone. Right? I wanted to find people who had understood how to overcome these situations and to better themselves and to reach their goals and their dreams and not get stuck at that one point.

Right? Because I think we all probably face this pivotal point in our lives and what you choose to do with it is crucial. I mean, what are your thoughts on that, Teri?

No, I agree totally. So the entire time you were speaking, the only thing I could hear was, what's your brand? What's your brand? Are you willing to compromise your brand for this moment, for this temporary situation? Because here's the thing, right?

And here's So now let's start to turn the page a little bit, right? So tomorrow's gonna come, right? You're gonna get up, you're gonna do your daily routine and you're gonna be at work. You have a 100% opportunity to continue to brand your purpose for your life, for your career. And no matter what that opinion is, we have a choice to either agree with that or to live in a way that shows that that really is a representative of who I am.

Right? So every day, I'll tell you this, every day I went in with the purpose to be the best version of Terry Baylor that I could be. If that meant listening to a podcast and getting inspired, if that meant calling Ralph and saying, hey man, I need a pep talk today. If that meant, hey, I have a one on one with one of my mentors, I wanna make sure that I don't miss that. If that meant, hey, I'm gonna, man, let me get a pep talk from my wife today.

Do what it takes to maintain your brand. And I think that's really what this is all about. It's the books, it's the mentors, it's something encouraging. And so that's what I would advise. That's my recommendation is you feed, what you feed yourself will come out.

So when you were talking about that moment and eight and a half years being compromised for these six months, I'm thinking, man, what type of mental, spiritual, physical exercise had you been doing to handle that moment? Because here's the deal, you can't get in the game and be like, coach, I'm ready to take this shot, throw me the ball. But the work, the work does not reflect you being ready for that moment. I a 100% believe, when you're talking through that moment, man, I transported back to that moment and I could see myself.

Yes. I could see myself. Yes.

And I remember how calm I was in that moment. I was extremely calm. And I think it was because all the information that we had been taken in, the books that we have read, the advice that we have been given, the one on ones that we've had about emotional quotient, right? How do we maintain that emotional quotient? So, I definitely wanna kind of dig into that a little bit because that's really what the crux of managing these moments is about.

And I'll say one the early books that you referenced for me that helped me in this moment was How to Win Friends and Influence People. That book, although it was about how to engage others and how to really serve others to help move the agenda forward. Those tidbits taught, they helped me understand human behavior. Yes. Which better helped me understand my behavior.

And so man, so as we start taking in that information, as we start digesting that information, as that information starts to challenge you, it's gonna change you, it's gonna change how you treat your friends, it's gonna change how you treat your kids, it's gonna change how you treat your wife. I'll tell you, man, when I was reading that, how to wear friends and influence people, and I'll be using some of those techniques and my wife would say, I know what you're doing. Because again, it was all about how can I serve you? How can I get to a place? Because here's the one thing guys, even in a difficult situation and Ralph, we say this all the time, it's hard to argue with someone who agrees with you.

Absolutely.

Now there's a technique to that. I'm not gonna necessarily agree with you about something that's not true, but what I can agree with you on is, hey, let's develop a plan forward so we can both see a success. So we gotta find some place of agreement. Then I would probably say that's, number one, to your point, understanding and managing your emotions in that moment. Get away, figure out.

You to. You said something that made me think back to how was I dealing with that moment? And I wanna make sure that we clear for everyone who's listening. It hurt bad. I'm not saying that you won't have pain.

And for me listening to that worship music on

the

way to the bus stop every day, the tears were flowing man. Sometimes the tears were because of the pain. Sometimes the tears were because of anger. Right? And forcing myself to give this thing over to God every single morning because everybody listening to this podcast has the ability and the capacity to be the best version of yourself or the worst version of yourself.

That's true. Every single day. You can be a show enough devil if you wanted to be or you can be the nicest person the person ever met. The difference is you have to choose which one you're gonna be. And if you have to Terry's point come up with a routine that helps you to cope with what you're going through so that when you show up to the game, you're giving your 100% best.

So it's 100% imperative, man, that you figure out a routine that works for you. For me, I just remember I'm a huge Fred Hammond fan and Fred Hammond right around '95, '96 was like the pivotal time for me in his music that was really speaking to me the loudest. And I got back into some of them old songs, man. And I remember sitting in the parking lot in the garage, just crying in my car, just really trying to give this thing over to God and disciplining myself so that when I showed up in the office building, I was ready. And it didn't last that long, but I'm being transparent to show that we're not trying to say that it doesn't hurt.

Have to Terry's point, you have to figure out which way works for you, but there is a process. But also when you went to How to Win Friends and Influence People, it's funny you said that because I'm actually reading that book all over again with my team at work. And you talked about how it helps you with human relations. So this is for our friends out there who are musicians and singers and stuff. You know if two people singing in two different keys, it just clashes and it doesn't work.

How to win friends and influence people causes you to become on the same key and flow in harmony. So things work better. Things work much easier. You don't have that opposition that you would hear like if you had two people playing in two different keys. I'll leave it at that.

You have to get the book and read it for yourself. Now that book was written probably in the 50s I think. Something like that. And concepts are 100% timeless. Because they're principle driven.

It wasn't made specifically for that time. That book will sail throughout the rest of history because humans are still humans and we all still respond to the same things. Something as simple as I believe one of the chapters says, the sweetest, words out of any person's mouth is the is your name.

Is your name. That's right. I knew that's where you were going. Yep.

They say they say the sweetest words that a person could ever hear is their own name. And when you understand that and instead of, you know, a person coming by and you done you didn't take the time to remember it and they're, hey. How you doing? And they could tell you don't know their name. That makes a difference in the way that you, communicate with that person, the way they trust and the way that they see you, things of that nature.

Just quick thirty seconds. A friend of mine told me a story about this gentleman who was a plant manager, of a plant down here in in Texas. He died recently. Older guy. Had been working forty, fifty years, said the church was packed out.

Right? So many people came to wish him goodbye and everybody said the same thing. He always remembered my name. He remembered my kids' names. He remembered my grandkids' names.

He remembered every special, event that happened in my life. When he would come up to he'd be like, how did Bobby do in the baseball game last week? Right? For everybody in the entire plant. Right?

So his wife, his widow gets up on the stage and she's crying because it meant so much to her. And she says, what y'all don't know is he carried a stack of index cards in his front pocket in all of your stories. He took the time to write down everybody's name, everybody's child's name.

Oh my gosh, that's amazing.

And touched about thousands of people. Not because he has such a good memory but because he was intentional. Yes, wow, that's a great story. So the power in a name, going out of your way to remember somebody's name or remember about their family and things of that nature putting what's important to them before what's important to you will create a synergy that helps you to get favor with that person. But yeah, no, no, I just wanted to mention those things as you

No, that's perfect Ralph because it goes right back to what I was saying to me, the number two thing is, which is you have to find a place of agreement. If you can establish that, find a place of agreement. And I believe, we started doing that, You found a place of agreement and went and won at what you were doing. I found a place of agreement that allowed the business to succeed. It allowed us, quite honestly, it allowed us to move forward.

It did. It allowed us not to be held in that light. Because again, we're the ones who own the perspective. We own what it looks like. We own what tomorrow looks like.

And so if we can be intentional about how we're gonna do that, I'm just hoping that this is helping somebody. I'm hoping that what you shared because some of the stuff you shared today, you haven't shared that with me. I'm like, wow.

I

didn't

Terry, as we get older man and we learn, my pastor, he preached something, man it was so powerful. He said that, there's seeds of greatness inside of all of us. But sometimes it takes the fire to release those seeds so that they can germinate and become great. Talked about the, redwoods up in, California and how, the seeds are all inside of them. But the heat from the forest fires is what opens them up so that the seeds can fall into the ground.

And I look at that situation that happened to us and I just told my wife this not too long ago. I said, do you realize that had that situation never happened I would have never left the company? I would still be there today. God and I've said this over the year, God does not miss. He does not he does not miss.

He knows exactly what he's doing. If he allows the fire to get hot, sometimes it's to get you to move into your destiny. Thank you for listening to the Leadership Sovereignty Podcast. We hope that you not only enjoy the content, but gained something to help you on your personal leadership journey. Feel free to reach out to us on x and Instagram under the handles Leadership Sovereignty.

Until next time, stay safe, peace, and blessings.